1.
Note your personal reference points that assist you in consciously experiencing
your emotions. How do you feel in your body when these emotions are present?
Happiness Fear Empowerment Anger Want
to cry Rage Terror, panic Depression Sadness
Love Empowerment Joy Numbness Hatred Grief After
crying Sweetness Self-love
Others:
2.
How do you feel when you are not experiencing your emotions?
3.
What are some of the ways that you know for sure that you are experiencing your
feelings?
Personal
Growth Funnel When we are closest to having what we want, our greatest
fears and self-doubts emerge. Fears include: 1.) fear of loss of self,
control, comfort zones, and relationships; 2.) fear of change and death; 3.)
fear of success; 4.) fear of our personal power. Fear of the unknown is
the glue that binds us to our known realities. At the point of change, we have
earned the right to experience the other side of the funnel - joy, freedom, rebirth,
and empowerment.
Know
and Understand Know that we all have unexpressed emotions. Everyone has
some issues about not being loved or appreciated. All of us have some concerns
about feeling separate or different from others. This is true no matter how much
people deny this or how self-confident they appear to be. The reason that we all
have such issues in common is that none of us always experienced love and appreciation
exactly when and how we wanted to.
The
key is what we want to do now. Do we want to blame others and feel victimized,
or do we want to progress with our lives? If we want to go forward, do we want
the easiest and fastest way or a slower and more tedious route? All roads eventually
lead to the same place, so our route of travel is a personal choice.
Select
the Fast or the Slow Lane Make a decision. Select the fast lane or the
slow lane, without judging your choice. You can change lanes at any time. The
following describes some of the choices available to you.
Slow
Lane Talk about and analyze your feelings rather than feel them. Judge
your emotions. Label them as bad or good. Need to know why things are as they
are and why you feel as you do. Blame someone or something for the circumstances
of your life. Resist changing and growing.
Fast
Lane Experience the sensations in your body and express them using sounds
and physical movement. Allow your emotions to be present without judging them
or trying to change them. Feel your emotions without slowing yourself down
to figure out the “why’s.” Take responsibility for your own
life and continue to move forward. Experience your new power, freedom, and
wholeness.
If
you select the slow lane, notice the areas in which you resist your emotions.
Notice that you would rather talk about and analyze your feelings than experience
them. Note that you tend to judge your emotions and label them as good or bad.
You want to know why things are as they are and why you feel as you do, because
you want someone or something to blame rather than moving forward with your life.
Be
aware that you are hanging out in the desert rather than walking through it so
that you can enjoy the oasis. If you enjoy stifling heat and you have brought
along plenty of water, stay in your intellect and continue to avoid your feelings.
Try to figure out why things are as they are. Blame others for your characteristics
or the situations in your life.
If
you want to munch on dates and sip cool drinks in a hammock underneath a palm
tree or swim in the pool, try the fast lane and see if you like it. You can always
change lanes again.
Personal
Reflection Exercise #4 The preceding section contained exercises to assist
clients in experiencing their emotions. Write two case study examples regarding
possible applications of these exercises.
Reviewed 2023
Update How past trauma impacts emotional intelligence:
Examining the connection
Gottfredson, R. K., & Becker, W. J. (2023). How past trauma impacts emotional intelligence: Examining the connection. Frontiers in psychology, 14, 1067509. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2023.1067509
Peer-Reviewed Journal Article References:
DeTore, N. R., Gottlieb, J. D., & Mueser, K. T. (2021). Prevalence and correlates of PTSD in first episode psychosis: Findings from the RAISE-ETP study. Psychological Services, 18(2), 147–153.
Hyland, P., Karatzias, T., Shevlin, M., McElroy, E., Ben-Ezra, M., Cloitre, M., & Brewin, C. R. (2021). Does requiring trauma exposure affect rates of ICD-11 PTSD and complex PTSD? Implications for DSM–5. Psychological Trauma: Theory, Research, Practice, and Policy, 13(2), 133–141.
Palgi, Y., Karatzias, T., Hyland, P., Shevlin, M., & Ben-Ezra, M. (2021). Can subjective perceptions of trauma differentiate between ICD-11 PTSD and complex PTSD? A cross-cultural comparison of three African countries. Psychological Trauma: Theory, Research, Practice, and Policy, 13(2), 142–148.
QUESTION
13 What is an example of Personal Growth Funnel? To select and enter your
answer go to Test.